R E A D S + R E V I E W S

Time seems to be going so fast!! I cannot believe this is my 5th update! Today for dinner, some of our group got the chance to eat at a Tea Garden. It was so amazing to experience. Small trees surrounded us, under a canopy of sheets that were hung around the trees. The little paths of brick led us to each table area, and It was all outside. The hospitality was so sweet! Keep PRing that I get moments in the middle of where I am that bring me closer to the heart of God. He is truly found in simplicity most days. But those days are pretty much astounding. I have had a chance to get quiet time and escape to the park again. Their is a 10% chance I'll go unoticed, at least to the point where no one comes up to me or gawks. This time was not one of them. I sat on the steps of one of the small overhangs journaling and soon a few older men came up to me to see what I was writing. I think they were interested in how different our writing is. After a minute of staring at the jou...

I will always say what a blessing coming home has been. It seems perfectly crazy for me to say this, because in most ways, I have felt the worse I have ever felt in the month of being home. I think alot of the time it felt similar to having an arm or leg fall asleep and then trying to wake it up again..it is something that takes a while, and there are sharp pricks along the way. I can state, very convincingly, that God is true to his Word; he is close to the brokenhearted. Extremely close. I cannot say what exactly made coming home so hard. It was just God. It was just China. It was just making myself more him and less me. It was saying "yes, Lord" even when everything hurt and I wished that I could beg, but I didn't. It hurt. I was ripped in two, and I didn't know which half I really was. I didn't know which half to really cling to. But I didn't need to find out. Gratefully. Psalms has been incredible to me lately. One verse I love, I read ...

Some days I miss the strangest things from China. Like today, I started to miss how I use to wash my clothes in the shower, almost every night. I don't even know why I started to miss this. I just did. As I was putting clothes I had just washed into the dryer, I thought about how weird the dryer sounds. All the crackling noises. It sounded foreign to me all of a sudden. Maybe I miss how simple it was to wash my clothes myself, and that I did it, it was something I did that was rewarding. The last week before I left I kept saying how the only thing I wouldn't miss was washing my clothes in China. Now I am eating those words. weird. Although, for the sake of the dryer, I love dryers. The reward is so great! When the clothes are dry you can hug the clothes and its like a heating blanket. Warm clothes. Amazing. Monday was a surprise to me and an amazing night. I met some foreign exchange students, while at Crossroads. I sorta kinda spoke to them in Chinese, and he...

Today I appreciate cereal. I have missed it, and am very happy to have it back. I have involuntarily become a morning person since arriving back too. As I type it is 8:34 am, I woke up at 7am. Normally this would not be a very common occurrence for me, but jet lag has messed this all up. The only consolation is that the Today Show around 7 or 8, is actually better than the Today Show at 9 or 10. So I watch. Being up this early, I see what David meant, "He is like the light of morning at sunrise..." When traveling you see a lot of mornings. And to me they are all special. It doesn't matter how long I have slept or if I have slept, His mercies rise with the sun.

I think I just realized, I use the word weird a lot... This is weird that I am writing about my use of the word weird. Although, I think weird is the best word to describe things sometimes. I am home. And it feels weird. I actually don't know why I am writing at this moment because I can't think of the right words to use about the last two months. I will say, however, that God is super special to me and he does make all things new. I feel like being hold up in my room for some days. And I am so ok with doing that. I need to do this. I think the fact that last night, my first night back, was such a rough time tells me I need to be hermit-ish for a while. Lots of things came down on me then. But I really think I was being prayed over, because I felt peace too. Today my head feels fuzzy. My time would normally be 2 am right now. But instead its 2 pm, and I don't think my body believes this at all.

I am leaving in one WHOLE week. To say that I feel ready would be weird. Actually I "feel" ready, but I am not sure if I am. I don't know if you can ever be. I think its just God. Its Him who knows what to push. Where to push. He knows why I am going. He grows me. I guess that has been my prayer all along, that I would take all things genuinely and just go. God has taken care I me. I mean really. He really has. Its the most precious thing to experience. I am excited to travel. I have always loved it, even when I have hated it. Over last weekend I visited family in Louisville. I just keep hearing some of their stories. My grandmother was one of 9, and last week she turned 90. Everyone else is gone. My grandad graduated in 1938 and was on a Navy boat for the last part of WWII. My Granny got married in England. My Nanny (great grandmother) use to tell me stories about picking strawberries and encountering minks when she was a little girl. The stories she...